march? what?

I was reading my livejournal - my old, now defunct livejournal -- and laughing in that same half-embarrassed way you read old emails and just cringe at your voice and content. The way you have to ask yourself, "what the hell was I talking about?" while at the same time admitting that you know exactly what you were talking about. Some highlights from 2006:

- the stress associated with almost dating a dental student and having to manage a relationship and acute fear of dentists
- an absurd and completely uncalled for rant about a laundromat on the lower east side
- realizations I made while sitting at my desk at Eclipse, many of which refer to drinking water, shades of truth, and Jonathan
- Opera lyrics from which I was attempting to extract meaning
- a fake article mocking the possibility of New York City hosting the 2007 winter olympics
- how Chloe rented an apartment from the drummer of Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
- pirate envy
- ryan cabrera

Here's to wildly random couple of years that I really just love to look back on and smile about.

dalai lama

time flies by so fast in this city I sometimes forget everything I've seen and heard since I moved here.

My dad's 56th birthday was on Sunday, and for a birthday present I gave him Jimmy Carter's new book about the grand solution he's constructed for the crisis in the Middle East. I went to Barnes and Noble with Jana, got it signed by President Carter himself.

I never really gave myself the chance to reflect on the situation and how surreal it was, possibly because it just flew by so incredibly fast. Wait on line. Climb stairs to 2nd floor. Security men. "Open your bags please." Okay, pass through. Open your book to the front cover. "Hello Mr. President." Thank you for coming, thank you for buying my book. Sign, sign, cross the t, close the cover, move to the end of the table. More security. "Keep the line moving people, keep it moving."

I met a former president who, in his new book, may have proposed a solution to the crisis in the Middle East, a proposition that very may well play a large part in creating some sort of order in that area of the world. It's pretty damn amazing if you actually take time and think about it. Jimmy Carter, former peanut farmer turned former pres. Huh.

Then tonight I suddenly remembered, after researching the Dalai Lama for an essay for a good hour, that I heard him speak in Central Park. Granted, it was about six years ago, but how did that memory fall between the cracks? I can still picture him in his orange robes, the high noon sun reflecting off of his little head.

What's really frustrating me is I can't remember a damn thing he said. And I would kill to hear him speak now (in a compassionate, non-violent way of course).

Regardless, I guess the point of this post is to flesh out an essay that I'm writing -- a piece about discovering simple truths in this chaotic city, religion on the Lower East Side, how all human beings are the same and are eternally searching for happiness and compassion regardless of how they do so -- burning Joss paper in metal buckets in the hallways of my old apartment building, dancing in Sarah Roosevelt Park, scribbling prayers in marker on the sides of buildings. And then, much more on the possibility of internal awareness (reflection) in spite of a heavy external awareness (listening for the oncoming R train, feeling the breeze from an approaching R train rustle the hair in front of your eyes). Can the difference be reconciled?

It has to be, somehow. Somehow.

valentine's

happy valentines day, from Rothko.


and from t.s. eliot, my favorite love song. (and a re-post):

The Love Song of J. Alfred Profrock

...And would it have been worth it, after all,
After the cups, the marmalade, the tea,
Among the porcelain, among some talk of you and me,
Would it have been worth while,
To have bitten off the matter with a smile,
TO have squeezed the universe into a ball
To roll it towards some overwhelming question,
To say: 'I am Lazarus, come from the dead,
Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all'-
If one, settling a pillow by her head,
Should say, "That is not what I meant at all.
That is not it, at all.'

And would it have been worth it, after all,
Would it have been worth while,
After the sunsets and the dooryards and the sprinkled streets,
After the novels, after the teacups, after the skirts that trail along
the floor --
And this, and so much more?-
It is impossible to say just what I mean!
But as a magic lantern threw the nerves in patterns on a screen:
Would it have been worth while
If one, settling a pillow or throwing off a shawl,
And turning towards the window, should say:
"That is not it at all,
That is not what I meant, at all.'

...I grow old...I grow old...
I shall wear the bottom of my trousers rolled.

Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each...

on bridges

a good day -- random run in with a great guy I haven't seen in years. i am, however, (probably because of this run-in) out of words. but here are some photos i've taken over the past 7 years. you know how i am about bridges and trains and such.

mom and dad, verrazano





waterwalk, verrazano




Q train on the manhattan bridge




flat stacey and the golden gate




brooklyn bridge, against manhattan




more brooklyn




nyu senior cruise, williamsburg bridge




view from 200 water street dorm, 2004: east river bridges

snow!

it's been a silly year for snow in the city. usually we see more sleet/rain/ice/shit than any real snow, so it's been a nice treat.

I found some old photos from the blizzard here in 2006 -- of course we went out and played in the streets, as there was over two feet and absolutely no traffic.








Spring Street



Sullivan Street


This is what happens when you take a dare to jump straight into a 3-foot pile of snow on Houston Street -- you get stuck.



:)

more softer world

asw

redesign

Not sure if I should call whatever I did to the header of this blog a "redesign." That word implies something along the lines of an overhaul or major re-work of a creative concept.

Yeah. I took an image from my Kodak Gallery page, resized it in Photoshop, messed with the original Blogger template I was using and this is what I came up with.

I'm really happy with the finished product though. I removed the Ezra Pound quote I had because I realized I probably didn't need it. As a refresher, here is is:

"And New York is the most beautiful city in the world? It is not far from it. No urban night is like the night there... Squares after squares of flame, set up and cut into the aether. Here is our poetry, for we have pulled down the stars to our will."

Initially I liked the image he created with the words "flame" and "aether;" hence my choice of photo to replace this quote. I took this photo when I was living on Delancey Street in 2007. I believe this is a shot of Houston Street, near Chrystie Street, from the pavement on a cold November night.

Waves and waves of flame, set up and spliced into aether. There is my poetry, for I capture brake lights to my will.